How partners can support a breastfeeding mum

Breastfeeding is a Team Effort

While only the mother can nurse the baby, support from those around her — whether that is a partner, family member, friend, or wider community — can make a huge difference to her comfort, confidence and wellbeing. Here are practical ways to help:

1. Make sure she is comfortable

Help her find a supportive chair or position.
Offer extra cushions or a footstool to ease back and arm strain.
Adjust the lighting or room temperature if needed. Think of yourself as the stage crew to her headline act.

2. Offer water and snacks

Bring a glass of water before or during every feed because breastfeeding is thirsty work.
Some feeding sessions can last a while, especially at the beginning, so come armed with snacks she can eat one handed. Bonus points if they are not crumbs all over the baby snacks.

3. Bring essentials to hand

Pass her the phone, TV remote, book, or glasses if she is already settled with the baby.
Have muslins, burp cloths, and spare breast pads within reach. Imagine she is the queen on her throne and your job is to keep everything close by so she does not have to move.

4. Take care of practical tasks

Change nappies between feeds so she can rest.
Breastfeeding is a full time job so step in with visitors, house chores, and the doorbell. No mum wants to be greeting Amazon mid latch.

5. Share bonding time with the baby

Supporters can still bond through skin to skin contact, burping after feeds, bathing, cuddling, and talking to the baby.
Night time settling or rocking can be your time to shine and give mum a precious extra 20 minutes of sleep, which is basically gold dust.

6. Offer emotional support

Listen without judgement if she is finding feeding hard.
Reassure her that she is doing a good job, because she probably needs to hear it fourteen times a day.
Help her access professional breastfeeding support if needed.
And remember, hormones can run very low in the early weeks, so do not take things personally if she seems teary, short tempered, or overwhelmed. A little patience goes a long way.

💡 Note on hormones and emotions
After birth, a mum’s hormones shift dramatically. Oestrogen and progesterone, which were high during pregnancy, drop suddenly once the placenta is delivered. This can trigger the baby blues, those weepy and fragile days in the first week.

For most mums, the feelings ease after a few days, especially with rest and support. If sadness, anxiety or overwhelm continue for more than a couple of weeks, it might be a sign of postnatal depression. This is more common than many realise and nothing to be ashamed of. The best thing supporters can do is offer patience, kindness and encouragement, and gently support mums in seeking help if things do not start to lift.

Key takeaway: Supporting a breastfeeding mum does not mean being on the sidelines. It means making sure she is comfortable, cared for, and able to focus on feeding, while still finding your own ways to bond with the baby. Supporting her emotionally is just as important as making the tea.